Loss
by justanoutlaw
Summary: The day Regina lost her powers, was the day Snow lost her belief.


**Based on my musings over Wish!Snow vs. Snow Prime's innocence and belief in others. I truly believe that Snow Queen is a fundemental part to Snow's morals and belief system, and without Regina...Wish!Snow was never truly the same.**

"To the Queen being banished!" Grumpy cried out, lifting his chalice in cheer.

"To the Queen being banished!" The rest of the crowd echoed.

The lively ball had been Blue's idea. Regina was gone, banished and powerless. There would be no curse, nothing to separate them. There should be a celebration and Snow knew that, as her hand cradled her baby bump. David stood by her side, drinking merrily and laughing along with everyone else, as he recounted the story for the millionth time for all that would listen. Snow did her best to fake a smile as he threw an arm around her.

"But Snow gets all the credit," he announced. "She was the one to do it, to finally take that witch's powers away." David planted a sloppy kiss to her cheek. "I am so proud of you, baby."

Snow nodded, squirming a bit in his grip. "Thank you, honey. I'll be right back."

Making her way out of the noisy ballroom, Snow walked up the stairs to her chambers. She sunk down onto the bed, the events of the day replaying in her mind. David was right, Snow had been the one to hold the box up, the very one that sucked away all of Regina's powers. The screams of agony would haunt Snow's dreams, along with the look up on her face. Betrayal. After all they had been through, Regina actually seemed surprised that Snow had done it.

Snow was surprised that she had actually done it.

Everyone told her it was such a great thing. There would be no curse, her child was no longer in danger, there was no chance of her being separated from her husband. Snow knew they were right, she didn't wish for any of that. Yet at the same time, she wished the price hadn't been what it was.

For so long, she clung to her faith that Regina could change, that she could be the woman she once knew. It couldn't have all been a lie. Getting ready for balls, the smiles, the inside jokes. It had to be real, at least that's what Snow told herself those cold nights in the forest. More than anything, she wished for a day that they could all be family again.

"You're thinking like a naïve child," Blue had chided when she shared that with her. "Not a queen."

She wasn't meant to be queen, Regina was. Regina knew what to do, what everyone needed. Snow could barely keep it together. She had freed a mass murderer for Christ's sake. How was she expected to run a kingdom?

Regina would know exactly what to do.

Where was she? Where would she end up? Was she safe?

Snow did the best to shake those thoughts from her mind. This was the woman that tried to kill her, that put her in a sleeping curse. She was willing to separate husband from wife, mother from child. At the same time, Snow understood. Regina had lost the love of her life. She couldn't imagine what she would do if she lost her Charming.

It took a minute for Snow to realize, she was crying. She was crying, because she missed Regina. She actually missed her, she wanted her back.

"She was never the woman you thought she was," Blue had reminded her. "She hates you."

Snow forced herself to repeat that over and over in her head. Regina hated her. She never would've changed. There was no chance.

"We did what we had to do," David had said, when Snow looked longingly at the place Regina had once stood after the banishment.

_We did what we had to do._

"A tiger doesn't change his stripes, or in this case, a Queen doesn't change how evil she is," Grumpy had drunkenly slurred when the party had barely begun.

_She never would've changed._

Snow allowed herself to cry, she allowed herself to mourn the woman that had been her family. She mourned the possibility that they could've been that way again. She mourned the loss of her innocence. She made a silent vow, to never, ever let that happen to the baby that was growing inside of her.

For once her tears had dried, Snow repeated the words that everyone told her over and over again. She said it so much, that eventually she believed it.

That was the night that Snow White's heart grew dark.


End file.
